Growing up in between homes, being kicked out at an early age has made me build a tough armor. I don’t always open up easily to people. Even if they are related to me. One of the few people I can put on that list is my grandmother. She is the only person that truly understands me. I think she understands me because I am a lot like her. She never hassles me about anything, never questions my decisions, always encouraging me with everything I do. It’s like she just gets it. She understands that I may have taken the road less traveled but she trusted that I would get there.
This week, we spoke about relationships, and I couldn’t believe that my 80 something year old grandmother had so much sound advice and so many jokes. I was laughing to tears, and tears of joy that I was able to bond with her in that way.
Her words were few but clear ” Don’t settle down with the first man who is head over heels for you, take your time in life to enjoy yourself. You don’t want to be tied down to a man at a young age before seeing what the world has to offer you. It doesn’t matter what everyone else thinks, I know a lot of things at my age and I want to share them with you. Have fun, enjoy your life. You have a lot to offer a man, you are smart, beautiful, surely any man wants to be with you, but don’t be with just any man. Take your time”
Those words touched me very deeply, I haven’t even opened up with my mother about things like this. (Weird maybe, I know but that’s just how my life has been). My grandma although in her 80′s is sassy, she is witty, funny and you can tell when she was younger she had the men in check. I love her with all my heart. I finally was able to see that, through generations certain things are passed on, sometimes they skip a generation. I don’t see a lot of my grandmother in my mother, but I see a lot of my grandmother in me. I will never forget when I was 10 years old and my grandmother came to visit, my mother was now remarried. My mother had just undergone an operation, and her stitches were bleeding, she needed to go to the hospital. My step father never drove her, she took a taxi. Even at that age I knew it wasn’t right. Later that night my grandmother told me “What he did to your mother wasn’t right, don’t ever let a man do that to you. Keep that between you and I.” So I did, at the time I was just glad that my grandmother agreed with me on my step father. We formed a bond early, over something that I now hear her warning me about. She wants to prevent me from going through that situation.
I love my grandmother with all my heart, I hope to learn as many valuable lessons from her as I can. I probably feel about my grandmother, the way some people feel about their mothers. I love her with all my heart, she has always managed to make me feel loved no matter what.
