“Oh no she didn’t! The nerve to say that about you! But don’t worry, I defended you.  Honestly, she has nothing better to do with her life than to create drama for other people. We’re so much better. I heard her man is two-timing her with her cousin or her best friend. I’m not sure but probably both. “

Gossip & drama somehow finds a way to creep into our lives. We claim to hate it but love it’s juice.  Actually,  a drama-free life seems so unorthodox but if ever accused of starting it, we’re deeply offended.

This past week was gossip central and although it’s made my work dynamics ridiculously entertaining,  people got hurt.

Gossip will most likely not cease to exist but we can control our own gossip monsters.  I’ve been part of unneccessary drama (who hasn’t) but  this week has also taught me that my life needs to be aligned with the outcome I want and drama isn’t on my vision board.

Whether we gossip or not, and most likely we will, admit to your participation, enjoy the thrill but also be prepared for it’s consequences.  As women, were known for starting and loving gossip but I say we try to break the broken telephone phenomenon of distorting truths.

I subscribed to a blog titled Balance In Me a few weeks earlier and every post I read on it is uplifting and inspiring.

I read a post  this week that I wanted to share with you, as I thought it rang true with every word and we can all learn a lot from it.

The title of hte post is “5 Life Lessons worth Your Time” written by Anastasiya.

It begins with this quote :

It is far more powerful to live your truth than to preach it.
Author Unknown

Here are the five lessons below, for the full article check out the post here.

1. Patience and perseverance

2. Loosen the reins

3. Accept who you are

4. Listen to your gut

5. Always challenge yourself

*image source

(I love this picture, I want this on top of my bed…)

I am still in the mindset of cheating and cheaters, since finding out about my father over the weekend. When I heard about the news, I wasn’t supposed to know, and although I tried to act like I wasn’t fased by it. I sure was. Immediately I panicked and texted my Mr. and said to him ” I know this text is completely random but promise me that if we are married later, and you want out or want to cheat you will let me know, promise”

He’s so smooth with his words, which is one of the many reasons I am head over heels for him. He always knows what to say to calm me and reassure me that its all going to be ok. So he replies ” I think we have established a foundating of truth here already, princess. I promise to always respect you and all aspect of our relationship”.

I know he must have gotten my first text and thought I was crazy, but he went out of his way to reassure me. I love that he understands that sometimes I may be prone to thinking in patterns that were constituted by my past, he is aware of this and takes into consideration. I trust my Mr. with all my heart, does the fact that I found out about my father make me think that he too will cheat on me on day? No, but I did want him to know that if he ever felt the urge to that I would welcome him telling me. I am terrified of my parent’s past repeating itself in my future, and he knows this. Sometimes  I have broken heel moments due to the past my parents laid before me, and my Mr. loves me through them, patiently.

“How did we make it here?” , “Where ?” pretending I am completely oblivious to the fact that we are walking arm in arm, happy as ever, walking past his old apartment from 7 years ago. He answers “Here ! You know this place, where we are, this stage, how did we get here?”. I think about this for a long moment, and maybe I am so happy to be with him, I can’t even think of the HOW, all I know is it feels absolutely divine. Him and I together it has always felt right. I didn’t really care to know how we made it here, as much as I cared to just remain here. I guess to remain here, I would have to find out how we got here.

When I saw him last night, there was no doubt in my mind that this was my man. I felt so peaceful, I felt so happy, I didn’t want it to end. His touch gave me shivers, walking holding on to him made my heart smile. I didn’t want him to go back (away to school). I wanted to tell him to stay, I knew he couldn’t. I wanted to tell him to come back, I knew he couldn’t. Mostly I wanted to tell him, that I was ready and that we should do this. Then I decided not to rush the speed of things but I really didn’t think we needed further proof that we were both completely head over heels for each other.  I didn’t say any of those things, but when I felt the urge to, I spoke them silently to myself. I know that there is a chance that he may have known all along what I was speaking in my heart.

I think I know how we made it here: real love, patience, faith, lots of forgiveness, truth. Here is to us continuing to be here, here is to you lifting me higher. As I went home, although I knew that he would be gone in a few days, I felt an incredible sense of strength. I asked my friend  “Does it sound silly to say that his love makes me stronger, because I really feel it does” she answered “It’s not silly if that’s how you feel”.

One of my happiest memories is when the Jill Scott album first came out, he gave it to me. I fell in love with this song, and every morning when I woke up I would play this song. It was such a great song for how he made me feel, and even better song to wake up to.

I digress… I am in love, I am happy. kthnxbye

*image from Weheartit.com

I like this quote a lot! In my past and for a long time, I thought I needed certain people to be a part of my life. Whether for validation, comfort or simply for companionship. I always believed I needed them. Truth is, sometimes I held on to some people that didn’t appreciate me the same way I appreciated them. What a waste of time. I would think that it was something to do with me. Regardless of the reason, the point is this: there is no need to wonder. If you are ever in a situation where you give your all and receive nothing in return: KEEP IT MOVING! Seriously, as the quote says - you don’t need anyone who doesn’t need you. Find people that are more valuable of your time and more appreciative of  you.  Anything else, is a waste of time. SIMPLE! The End.

You can always count on me to speak my mind. Sometimes, I feel people aren’t ready to hear my truth or my feelings. I find myself then pondering, whether or not what I said was acceptable, and whether or not sharing my feelings was a good idea. In some instances I can admit that my delivery wasn’t the best. That is something I learned that I should work on. It’s not so much what you say, but how you say it. If you are sharing your true feelings on something, others may not be ready to hear it. However, they will never be able to deny that you were being honest. Now here is the key part, if you expressing your feelings is offensive to others; your message will be lost in translations. All they will remember is the delivery, and not the message. Which at that point, doesn’t matter if you were being “real” or not because it is no longer about the message.

When I saw this image today, it made me think. As long as you are being true to your feelings, while being considerate of others when delivering your message. You shouldn’t have anything to apologize about.

I would much rather someone be “real” with me then tell me a lie in hopes to protect my feelings.

How do you feel about this?

image via Icanread